Entitled mom uses her kid's child support money on herself for years, then expects kid to pay back an $8k Parent PLUS loan with interest: ‘I paid my way through school’

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  • mother and teen daughter having an argument
  • "AITAH for refusing to pay back my mom for a Parent PLUS loan when she received child support until I was 22?"

    My parents divorced when I was young. When I was 13, my mom sued my dad for child support and received about $800 per month. She later
  • extended the child support obligation through my college years, so my dad continued paying until I was around 22.
  • During college, none of that child support money was used to help pay for my tuition or living expenses. I paid my
  • way through school largely on my own. Because I couldn't afford tuition outright, my mom took out a Parent PLUS loan for about $8,000 in her name.
  • At the time, I didn't have much say in the arrangement. I assumed the loan was part of her financial responsibility as a
  • parent, especially given that she was still receiving child support specifically tied to my education and support during those years.
  • upset middle aged woman sitting on a sofa and looking out the window
  • Now that I'm older, my mom is demanding that I personally pay her back for the Parent PLUS loan. I feel conflicted because:
  • • She received child support for me from age 13 through college . That money was never used to help pay for my education
  • The loan was taken out in her name, while she continued receiving support from my dad
  • . • I feel like the loan was used to justify continuing child support rather than to actually support me
  • From my perspective, asking me to repay the loan. feels unfair given the financial support she already received on my behalf. From
  • her perspective, she says the loan was "for me" and therefore my responsibility.
  • AITA for refusing to pay my mom back for the Parent PLUS loan under these circumstances?
  • Edit: to clarify, the child support was not used on me despite claiming child support through college to "help pay for my expenses". She did
  • not help pay for college besides the parent PLUS loan taken out during my junior year.
  • a woman holding a stack of money in her hands
  • readergirl35 4 years of $800 payments each month is $38,400. She was given over 38K to spend on you and your needs during your college years. She spent it on who knows what and took an $8,000 loan as her sole contribution to your education. I'd tell her that before there is any discussion of who should pay the loan, you want an accounting of the $9,600 a year child support she received and presumably spent on you.
  • You will discuss the loan when the child support is accounted for and not one moment before. Mute her on everything until she explains that or until she stops asking for money. Any conversation where she brings it up just say, mom I'm not talking about that until I see the accounting, we can talk about something else or end the conversation, your choice. Also lock down your credit and your personal information.
  • Expensive_Law_3180 NTA. Don't give your mother a dime. Really. When a parent takes out a parents plus loan for their kids' education, the parent is the only one financially responsible for paying back that loan, not the kid. Your momster can go to court and sue till the damn cows come home but there isn't likely to be a court anywhere in the US that would force you to pay back a loan your name was not on to begin with. If she continues to harass you, threaten to report her for fraud.
  • failingmyself This. loan contract is crystal clear that patent is financially responsible for paying back the loan. Not even the worst loan servicer in the world will come after you.

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